On a Related Point: “What (Else) Can Men Do? Grow the Fuck Up”

April 28, 2014 § Leave a comment

SLOW CLAPS FOR MATT LEMAY OVER AT MEDIUM, who just gifted me with the following glorious introductory paragraphs:

So, first things first, Shanley Kane wrote an essential guide to the steps that men in tech can take to address systemic sexism. You should read it.

I’d like to chime in with my own, less thoughtful suggestion: Men in tech, myself included, can grow the fuck up.

Men: If your response to that is “BUT I AM TOTALLY GROWN UP I MAYBE EVEN HAVE A WIFE AND SOME KIDS AND STUFF HOW DARE YOU,” then you fell into my devious trap because that is not a very grown-up response, is it? Growing the fuck up means being able to admit that you still have learning to do. It means opening yourself up to narratives in which you are not the expert or the hero. If you believe that your exceptional smarts make you an authority on other people’s experiences and perspectives, then you have some growing the fuck up to do.

Growing the fuck up is an excellent idea for everyone; as LeMay says in the world’s greatest concluding sentence, “‘Grow the fuck up’ isn’t an attack, it’s an invitation.” Link here!


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